lick ah the poose poose - April 2nd, 2009

whats the point? line and plane...

Apr. 2nd, 2009 | 10:23 pm

I can never do anything right.
I have a lot going on right now, and yeah I'm busy.
Half of the business is pleasure and the other half is just plain excruciating
and now my relationship with eddie is on the line...
all because a. i work b. i workout for one hour once a week, i should be going more but there's no time
c. this freelance project is really getting in the way and is starting to become a nuisance.
d. eddie makes it seem like every show i play is a joke...what's the point of playing at all??
i hate when he makes me ask that question to myself. everyone must think my bands are just a hobby...just a passer of the time.. but i want more and i deserve more. i've worked so hard for so many years dammit.
Maybe it truly is the time to breakup... because we dont really have that much in common anymore. I hate endings but Im so busy, would it even matter?? Of course I love him to death. but we have this social thing... where he dont like my friends he barely hangs out with his friends... he's pompous always talking shit. we barely ever have heart to heart conversations which is what a tortured soul like mine kind of needs.. i want to party more he wants to watch tv.. im so used to going out with out him that it becomes impossible to go out with him now. He blames me for being busy all the time yet he works late nights too.. especially weekends..and then i have this thing weighing on my shoulders where anywhere i go i feel like i should be somewhere else. it sucks. but i dont know what to do.. an now he's out with Razz, ugh. great night off for me.

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